The Stogie Guys

OK, I guess this officially marks me as an old fogey or whatever the proper term is these days. But I believe that words matter, and I cannot understand the current trend of naming cigars with distasteful and sometimes offensive names. I also can’t help but worry that it’s a dangerous trend.

The latest to catch my eye and prompt this screed is the Molotov from Quesada, intended to “create awareness of the dangers increased government and taxation…” I have no argument with them promoting their views. But why use a name associated with a deadly device that, while sometimes used in noble causes, such as the Finns and Hungarians, has also been used by terrorists to maim and kill?

Similarly, there’s My Uzi Weighs a Ton, named, I’m told, after a rap song with which I’m unfamiliar. (I read the lyrics online, but I’ve got to admit it still didn’t mean much to me.) Again, why link a cigar with an instrument of war and death?

And that brings me to Hammer & Sickle. I can only guess that there’s some sort of irony intended rather than a celebration of one of the world’s most corrupt and murderous regimes. If there’s irony in the name Donkey Punch, it’s even harder for me to see. Sick, misogynistic, distressing. Again, that’s what I want associated with a cigar?

I can only assume that these sorts of names are intended to make the cigars more appealing to younger smokers. That worries me because I believe it plays into the hands of anti-smoking forces who want to lump all tobacco together and use the fear of youth being corrupted to achieve their goals.

It’s hard to argue that the makers of premium cigars aren’t targeting youth when someone points to names like these. They fit right in with the machine-made, adulterated cigars that, frankly, do appear to be aimed at teens. Don’t be surprised when someone shows up at a smoking-ban hearing with a Donkey Punch or My Uzi as Exhibit No. 1.

Now, I’m not suggesting manufacturers shouldn’t be allowed to call their cigars whatever they want. I’m about as close to a First Amendment absolutist as you’re likely to find. But exercising a right doesn’t mean you escape the consequences. And in this case, I think these marketers are doing the industry and its customers a great disservice.

We say over and over again that premium cigars are for adults and aren’t marketed to kids. Actions need to be as strong as words.

–George E

photo credit: Google

This week there was another development in the Food & Drug Administration’s (FDA) push to regulate cigars. The agency announced it was extending the public comment period on it’s proposed regulation of cigars.

No reason was given for extending the comment period, but the extension gives cigar smokers another chance to register their opposition to FDA regulation. Cigar smokers got a hint at what regulation would mean in a recent Daily Caller article on the subject.

In the article, an FDA spokesperson said that under an FDA regulation regime cigars “would be subject to general controls, such as registration, product listing, ingredient listing, good manufacturing practice requirements, user fees for certain products, and the adulteration and misbranding provisions, as well as to the premarket review requirements for ‘new tobacco products’ and ‘modified risk tobacco products.'”

Such regulation would be devastating to the cigar industry, and in particular to boutique cigars and the creation of new blends. And “user fees” is just a bureaucratic term for more taxes on cigars, which are already at record high rates.

The FDA spokesman’s quote also shows a complete misunderstanding of the handmade artisanal nature of premium cigars.

“Ingredient listing” would be nearly impossible beyond “100% tobacco” since blends are regularly tweaked to provide consistent flavor from one year to the next. Further, even if blends aren’t changed, the chemical composition of tobacco leaves changes from harvest to harvest, meaning any disclosure of “ingredients” beyond tobacco would be either completely stifling or totally meaningless.

Similarly, by forcing new cigars to go through a costly FDA approval process, the now constant stream of new cigar blends would grind to a halt. Suddenly, instead of releasing small batch blends, cigar makers would be forced to focus on large runs that they think would have mass appeal after a time-consuming approval process.

All this should worry everyone who enjoys premium cigars. Fortunately, there are two important actions that can every cigar smoker can take.

If you haven’t yet registered your opposition, or even if you already have, please do so here by submitting a comment. Also write your Senators and Congressman today and ask them to support the “Traditional Cigar Manufacturing and Small Business Jobs Preservation Act of 2011,” which would repeal the FDA’s authority to regulate cigars.

–Patrick S

photo credit: FDA

In this issue of “Random Thoughts from the Humidor” I pontificate on an odd cigar name, a Honduran puro, a legal victory for cigars, and a new supporter of Cigar Rights of America.

Would you smoke “The Gagger”?

I’m a big fan of K.A. Kendall’s 7-20-4 cigars. I’ve enjoyed both the original and the new line, and I think the “Dog Walker” size is not only a good little smoke but also clever branding. (Even non-dog owners can relate to a cigar that’s just large enough to enjoy on a short walk.) I can’t say the same for his newest size, “The Gagger.” I honestly can’t think of a worse name for a cigar. Maybe that’s what he’s going for, but personally I don’t see it working. Then again, I’m not a big fan of 60-ring gauge cigars, so I’m probably not the target audience.

Humo Jaguar

Speaking of cigars with unique names, I was skeptical when I was first told about Humo Jaguar, named after the Honduras cigar festival of of the same name. The cigar, which is distributed by Miami Cigar & Co., is a Honduran puro made by Placensia and was the winning blend at the 2011 festival, where cigars by various Honduran makers were tasted blind. It happens to be a fantastic cigar, one of my favorite from the recent IPCPR show, with depth, plenty of body, excellent construction, and quintessential Honduran sweetness. As someone who generally reaches for Nicaraguan and Dominican smokes and not for Honduran smokes (especially puros), it reminds me how good Honduran cigars can be. To that end, it certainly achieves its goal.

Free Speech for Tobacco Companies

While I’m not a lawyer, the recent federal court decision striking down the new graphic warning labels for cigarette packages strikes me as particularly important. Finally, a judge stood up for the First Amendment rights of tobacco companies by saying that they cannot be forced to put propaganda on their products. While courts haven’t always recognized it, the graphic warning labels clearly are not about providing facts to smokers so they can make an informed decision, but are designed to persuade people not to smoke. As someone who worries about the artistry of cigar boxes being ruined by similar anti-tobacco propaganda, it’s good to see a judge standing up to government attempts to force companies to propagandize their customers.

Altadis USA Steps Up

Kudos to Altadis USA for signing up with Cigar Rights of America and also making a “significant contribution” to IPCPR. Up until they signed on a few weeks ago, Altadis, one of the largest premium cigar makers, was the one missing cigar company from CRA’s list of supporters. Now that they’ve stepped up, all of the largest cigar makers are represented with CRA.

–Patrick S

photo credit: Stogie Guys

The quest for the perfect cigar does not always end in riches, but sometimes the accomplishment is in the journey itself. I rolled into Mexico last week with my wife and a couple of friends for eight days of R&R at a resort on the island of Isla Mujeres, off the coast of Cancun. Being in a tropical paradise and a country where Cuban cigars are legal, I obviously set out to find the perfect cigar. In the end, it was the experience of the adventure and the search for the cigar that yielded more enjoyment than the cigar itself.

The first stop was the duty free-shop in the Cancun airport. I encountered the usual Cuban staples: Partagss, Montecristo, Romeo y Julieta. Three-packs and five-packs, most in the $50 to $100 range. A total rip-off. Are they even real? They had the hologram and the seal from Habanos, but I knew those were easy to fake. I decided to give it a chance though— given that I was in a duty-free shop and not talking to some vendor on the street, I figured the odds were slightly in my favor. I bought a three-pack of Romeo y Julieta No. 5 cigars for $25.

Motioning for the attendant to unlock the glass case, he smiled and asked, “¿Habla Español?” I held my thumb and forefinger an inch apart. “Un poquitito.” Just a tiny little bit. “¿De donde?” He asked. Where are you from? “Minnesota.” “Ah,” he nodded. “Venezuela.”

“No,” I waved a hand. “Mnnesota.” I pointed to my baseball hat and quickly realized I’ve just pointed to the red and white Minnesota Twins TC embroidered on my hat, surely confusing the poor gentleman. He’ll never connect TC to Minnesota, I thought, so I quickly explain, “The Twin Cities.” He nodded and smiled and I’m not sure how much he understood, or how much he cared, because the next thing he did was point me to the cash register. I paid for my three-pack and the girl bagged my stogies in plastic and secured them with a twist tie. I passed through customs and an hour later, my party and I were on Isla Mujeres.

I knew the island would be filled with cigars and vendors pushing them on every corner and after five minutes I knew that even if these Cubans were real, I wouldn’t want to touch them. The vendors cared for their cigars the same way I care for my dirty laundry. If there was a bin they could have used to toss these cigars in for their store for display, they would have used one. I saw boxes of cigars arranged outside on the steps leading into a shop, probably boiling to death under the 90-degree sun or sopping under the 90-percent humidity. I saw wrappers cut and wrinkled like the cigar had been carried in someone’s pocket. I saw gnarly, makeshift variety-packs where a Cohiba shared a box with a pair of cheap Montecristos and a handful of nameless mix-and-match cigarillos. The prices weren’t bad but these cigars were so unattractive that I was happy I brought a six-pack of Sancho Panza Double Maduros from home.

I shared the Romeo y Julietas with the couple we traveled with, giving one to the husband, another to the wife, and keeping the third for myself. This would be the first cigar either of them had smoked and they needed a quick seminar. I cut their ends and demonstrated how to light it, and how to puff on the stogie. “Don’t pull too fast,” I warned them. “You don’t want to hotbox it.” “Do I inhale?” asked the wife. “No,” I said. “Just enjoy the taste.”

We sat on a cliff overlooking Mexico’s easternmost point, watching and listening to the waves, smoking Cuban cigars. After 15 minutes of peace and solitude unknown to the American hustle-bustle, it was time to move on. “How do you put it out?” they asked.

“You don’t,” I told them as I gently placed my smoldering nub on the edge of the cliff. “Just let it go out on its own. Respect the stick. Leave it here, and let it be.” They did, and we walked back to our golf cart and began the journey back to our hotel.

On the way back we passed a small baseball stadium with a capacity of probably 5,000. There was a bronze statue of a baseball player outside but we passed it too quickly for me to read the name. Then I realized, they have their own baseball heroes in Mexico. Their own great games, their own legendary moments. Mexican baseball was a whole new universe, and one where I could happily spend a lifetime.

When we got closer to our hotel, the vendors appeared with their calls to Cuban cigars. But aside from the Romeo y Julietas, the Sanchos were all I smoked. Sure, the vendors are constantly pointing to their, “Cigars! Cuban cigars!” They think that since you’re a guy, you’re going to jump all over them but these guys are clearly marketing to the cigar-ignorant, and based on the volume of product available, this is a market that thrives.

Sadly, I never found the perfect cigar. Sure, the cigars from the airport were good, but I was hoping to try an authentic Cohiba Behike. All I encountered was the bottom of the bargain bin. As I stared into the blue water I realized that every quest does not end in glory, especially the quest for the Holy Grail. My crusade would have to continue on another trip, to be resumed on my next journey overseas. Until then, I could only relish in the excitement of the search and the anticipation of another adventure.

–Mark M‘s latest project is a comic anthology called Germ Warfare.

photo credit: Stogie Guys

[Editor’s Note: “Cigar Face-Off” is a new feature where we compare and contrast cigars that share at least one important attribute. Please let us know what you think about the new feature in the comments below, and feel free to suggest two cigars for a future Face-Off.]

Here’s a face-off between two thick Cuban cigars. Each has a ring gauge of 54 and sells for around $20. They both also happened to be featured in the September selection of the Diamond level of Canadian Cigar Company’s cigar-of-the-month club. (All their recent cigar club selections can be seen here.)

Montecristo Open Eagle

I didn’t have high expectations for this cigar, which was introduced a few years back as a premium Cuban for new cigar smokers. For that reason, I had avoided the entire Montecristo Open line until I smoked this 5.9-inch cigar.

What I found was pretty much as advertised: a mild smoke, with pleasant flavors and flawless construction that would probably suit a beginner nicely. Even though the flavors were a bit mild for my tastes, it had excellent balance and sweet cedar notes, and towards the end it added in some characteristic Cuban earthiness. Think of it as a tamer version of the Montecristo Edmundo.

Romeo y Julieta Duke EL 2009

Without a doubt, this is one of the best looking Cuban cigars I’ve seen in awhile. It has a dark, oily wrapper and perfectly squared triple cap. The 5.5-inch smoke was generally well-constructed,  except for needing multiple touch-ups to keep the burn even (which is disappointing for a cigar that can cost in excess of $20 each).

As for its flavors, the cigar reminded me of the 2007 Romeo y Julieta Escudos, with coffee, oak, and cocoa notes all apparent. Unfortunately, there was also a sourness that came and went throughout the cigar. Still, there was much to enjoy in this medium- to full-bodied Cuban.

Conclusion

The Montecristo Open Eagle was better than I thought, but ultimately I don’t like the Open blend as much as the regular Montecristos (the Petit Edmundo and classic Monte No. 2 both offer more flavor for less money). Meanwhile, the Romeo y Julieta Duke demonstrated some real potential and more interesting flavors, but was held back by the sour notes and inconsistent construction.

I fully expected to come out of this cigar face-off proclaiming the Duke the unanimous victor, but my ultimate conclusion isn’t so clear-cut. Ultimately, with some age, I think the Romeo y Julieta Duke will be the far superior cigar (particularly if you prefer a fuller-bodied smoke). Right now, though, the Montecristo Open is slightly better due to its balance.

–Patrick S

photo credit: Stogie Guys

If anyone doubts that cigars can bring a diverse group of people together, just take a glance at the list of cosponsors for legislation to bar the U.S. Food and Drug Administration from regulating handmade premium cigars.

At a time when it seems Congress might have trouble agreeing that the sun will come up tomorrow, the list of about 90 proponents presents a bipartisan bonanza. Sure, most of them are Republicans, as you’d expect for a proposal to reduce regulation. But look further.

There’s Charlie Rangel, the New York Democrat excoriated by many smokers when he headed the Ways and Means Committee during SCHIP consideration. And Jesse Jackson Jr., the Chicago-area Democrat with a perfect 100 rating from the liberal Americans for Democratic Action, is on the list with the GOP’s Duncan Hunter, a Californian who got a 0 from the same group. Similarly, try to think of another bill that would have the support of both Brooklyn Democrat Ed Towns, cosponsor of an impeachment measure for President George W. Bush, and Republican Joe Wilson of South Carolina, the man who yelled “You lie!” at President Barack Obama during a joint congressional address.

My purpose here, though, is more important than simply pointing out an interesting situation. This is valuable, useful information.

If your representative or senators haven’t signed on, you need to let them know you want them to do so. And you should draw attention to the bipartisan nature of support for HR1639, known formally as the “Traditional Cigar Manufacturing and Small Business Jobs Preservation Act of 2011.”

It’s a rare politician who can resist the siren song of bipartisanship. Knowledge also demonstrates that you are an engaged citizen, and politicians know that not only do engaged citizens vote, they exert a lot of influence on others who vote.

At StogieGuys.com, we’ve devoted a lot of time and writing to this issue. You can go through the archives to find everything from analysis of the bill to tips for how to most effectively contact your legislators.

We’re staying on this because we believe it is vitally important. Not only is eliminating FDA regulation critical, the recognition of handmade premium cigars would make it easy and likely that they will be exempted from future tobacco regulations. All it will take is a line that says “except for cigars as defined in the Traditional Cigar Manufacturing …”

–George E

photo credit: UPI.com

What could be better or more appropriate these days: I’m writing this as I listen to the call of playoff baseball on the radio, the game’s oldest form of electronic communication, via iPad, one of the newest.

I’m enjoying a cigar as the Yankees play the Tigers, whose late broadcaster, Ernie Harwell, noted in his Hall of Fame induction speech that the things that make up the game, include “cigar smoke, hot roasted peanuts, The Sporting News …”

Nothing seems to go together more than sports and cigars. And for most of the country this is a golden season, whether you are actively participating or simply observing.

For observers, playoff baseball is obviously hard to resist. Football at all levels is getting interesting. If you like to participate, in most places the weather’s great for golf, tennis, softball, fishing—just about whatever you like.

A cigar can make it even better, whether you are lighting up as you walk the back nine, choosing your favorite stick from the humidor before settling in with your friends to watch the big screen at a neighborhood B&M, or celebrating a win in any contest with a victory smoke.

Of course, myriad restrictions have made lighting up these days nowhere near as easy as it was in Ernie’s heyday. A stadium where you can smoke is about as rare as an unassisted triple play. Many other venues are off-limits as well.

But that doesn’t mean it is impossible to have a cigar while you enjoy or pursue sports. And cigar pleasure is worth celebrating, even if you have to go a little out of your way to do it.

So, enjoy the fall and your favorite sport with a good cigar. Or two.

–George E

photo credit: Flickr