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Stogie News: Got Wood? You’re Busted!

30 Nov 2006

First the anti-smoking zealots stripped business owners of their right to offer smoke-friendly accommodations, and now they’re attacking our harmless wooden decorations. Tobacconists and Stogie Guys beware because cigar store Indians are now officially under fire.

Sure, the following frightening tale comes from our socialist neighbors to the north (Windsor, to be more precise), but given the ferocious speed with which anti-smoking fascists were able to strip us of our basic freedoms in the U.S., how long is it before cigar store Indians are criminalized in America?

Soubhi Assi said he’s put up with a lot over the last few months, but when the health unit started messing with his Indian, he drew the line.

Assi, who owns the Downtown Smoke Shop, said health unit inspectors were in his store last week and told him the life-sized carved wooden Indian near the front door is illegal because it promotes tobacco use.

Assi said he’s obeyed the provincial smoking ban, which outlaws signs promoting tobacco or accessories, by taking down advertisements, removing prices from cigarettes, and replacing a neon “Cigar” sign with a “Coffee” sign, even though he doesn’t sell coffee.

He also covered the overhead sign with his store’s name on it, although it was replaced with another sign that sarcastically declared, “Don’t look at this sign. It may cause cancer.”

As I give well-deserved props to Assi for having a good sense of humor while the paternalistic government breathes down his neck and threatens his way of life, I hope you find this ridiculous scenario as sad as I do. If I ever find myself in Windsor, I’m stopping by the Downtown Smoke Shop to shake Assi’s hand and make a very large purchase.

For now, though, let’s hope this absurdity stays where it belongs – up north.

Patrick A

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5 Responses to “Stogie News: Got Wood? You’re Busted!”

  1. Anonymous Thursday, November 30, 2006 at 2:54 am #

    “Don’t look at this sign. It may cause cancer.”

    HILARIOUS!!!

  2. Sara Wilson Wednesday, April 4, 2007 at 10:55 pm #

    Excuse, and what you think concerning forthcoming elections?

  3. emma Monday, April 9, 2007 at 12:43 am #

    cool blog!

  4. Timoty Sunday, April 15, 2007 at 9:10 pm #

    cool blog!

  5. Tima Tuesday, April 17, 2007 at 10:05 pm #

    nice photos of this blog